Announcer : Miss 3rd Ward , what is your aspiration in life ?'
Beyoncé : To be happy .
An excerpt from Beyoncé's track Pretty Hurts , she answers as I would hope mankind would : To be happy . Happiness in itself is a phenomenon universally accepted as THE ultimate achievement of anyone's existence . We dream of a carefree life . One overflowing with love , with freedom , and a filled void we'd long accepted as 'a part of life' . We subconsciously wish of individual ecstasy that would , unbeknownst to us , simultaneously translate into a collective widespread euphoria . This is perfect , except perfect does not exist . . . yet .
I don't claim to speak on behalf of anybody other than myself . I don't believe to have all the answers . I address truths as I see them based off of the life I've lived and the world I exist in , because we all live in very distinct realities specific to -US- .
Primitive example : you and I are walking down the street . You express that it's deathly hot outside . I express that I'm comfortable . In your reality , because it proves true to YOU , it's hot . In my reality , because it proves true to ME , it's not . Those choosing to dissect will say 'that's just an opinion' but isn't an opinion simply something that's proven true to you ?
Despite the fact that we all strive to achieve happiness , I believe there's an unspoken controversy because we as humans can't precisely explain , label , categorize , pinpoint , or otherwise put happiness in a box . Some can't accept the blanket concept because individual happiness sometimes conflicts with another's idea of 'approved' happiness . I'd go as far as to say that for a lot of people , the relative nature of happiness is unsettling . I struggle to understand why examples like interracial or same sex relationships are still a thing , but they are .
Moving on .
The YOU hand .
On the YOU hand your happiness is your happiness . Period . At the end of the day , if you're happy - that's all that really matters in the world because those that love you will rejoice in your happiness . This is the hand I personally side with .
With that said but on the opposite side of the same hand , many have deep rooted insecurities - abandonment , codependency , the feeling of disappointing others - that keep them from reaching their individual happy place . It's almost crazy to think that in many instances we allow our minds and emotions to take over and we 'allow' the ones we love the most to be the ones keeping us from the one thing we've wanted our entire lives . . . happiness . . . meanwhile those loved ones have no idea . 'I couldn't move away to chase my dreams because I didn't want our relationship to change or for either of us to miss the other too much' . This is a YOU problem .
The THEM hand .
On the THEM hand , some of us have accepted and allowed individuals to be constants in our lives : family members , friends , acquaintances , and coworkers you can actually stand to entertain a relationship with outside of the work place . These are the people that we've attributed , to some degree , value to their opinions . A lot of times we don't do things for ourselves because the ones around us have voiced that in one way or another - your happiness is an inconvenience for or belittles them . 'What am I going to do when you're gone' , 'omg , you're so lucky - I never get to do anything like that' , 'just leaving me behind' or one that never gets old 'so jealous' . We've all heard these and much more and while we don't like to admit it , statements like these have left us feeling some type of way .
If you take anything from this , I hope it's what follows :
STOP CARING ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK - ESPECIALLY WHEN IT COMES TO YOUR HAPPINESS . LIVE TO NOBODY'S STANDARDS BUT YOUR OWN
When I moved across the country and left everything and everyone I knew , I got every comment in the book . The 'I'm really going to miss you's came from a good place . Others came from selfish places . . . . specifically 'who am I gunna party with/ get us free drinks' , 'who's gunna introduce me to the hot girls' and my favorite 'don't worry , you'll be back and you can stay with me . LA is really tough to make it in' . These were coming from people I called friend . People I thought believed in me or at least simply wanted me happy . I soon noticed that they only wanted me happy when it was convenient for them . I was obviously a 'connect' but that's not what this writing is about , that topic has WAY too many negative undertones . No thank you .
I took my happiness into my own hands and ran with it . The best decision I've ever made . I've grown . I push my own envelope . I've become even more creative . I actively put out the BEST vibes I know how to . I smile so often it's almost unnatural and I've noticed that my happiness has been a motivator for others to run with their own .
This has gotten long and for good reason because sometimes you can't put your thoughts in a paragraph , yourself in a summery or your happiness in a box . I'll close out by saying this : if you are happy , be happy . If your genuine happiness whether it be moving away from your comfort zone , quitting your job and traveling the world , an interracial or same sex relationship , getting a boob job , or anything that isn't promoting hate or endangering anybody . . . run with it . Once we all find our individual happiness , we'll find ourselves chillin in that unbeknownst collective widespread euphoria and THAT's perfect . #SomeDailyJoe
When you're alone all by yourself and you're lying in your bed . Reflection stares right into you . . . are you happy with yourself ?
As she picked herself back up . . . As she started over . . . 'Yes'