Why DEATH Was Good For Me

This is not laden with images because this is something I'm hoping you all will READ .
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​It's not every day we personalize death . We're outraged about the killing of unarmed Americans . We stand in unity with countries  where their citizens are massacred by Isis or other terrorist groups . We even get up in arms about the inhumane slaughter of animals . It's important that these unfortunate occurrences garner our attention , as they should , but again - we rarely . . . individually . . . address death . 

Let me first speak on fear . Fear is defined as an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous , may cause pain or is a threat . Ok , sure . I understand . I think it's important to grasp the concept of fear but not to operate in it . Some say fear is a defense mechanism ; that it keeps you safe . I call bullshit . Fear is completely a product of the mind and a scapegoat we use so we don't have to face the root of issues . You're not afraid of the dark . The root is that you don't feel safe because you lack an awareness of your surroundings . You're not afraid of spiders . You are disgusted by their appearance and you are taught from a very young age that spiders can cause you harm . It's easy to say you fear things this trivial but it's simply a lazy way of getting around the root of why you're uneasy . Moving on . 

Some of you know that my dad died 4 months before I was born . He died of a heart attack at 23 . Fast forward . My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer the first time and was given 10 years to live . She beat the 10 years only to be diagnosed a second time . Before the second diagnosis , she was neglected and to be frank - almost killed on multiple occasions courtesy of what I'm convinced was medical malpractice . . . but I'm no lawyer . Lost a friend to cancer .  One of my close friends was killed in a car accident the last day of my senior year of high school . My God Father passed away just over 2 weeks ago . Not to continue and overload , one could say that I've had the reality of death or possibility of death in my face so many times in my life that I had no choice but to have a very eye opening pow wow with the concept of death . 

I've realized that I do not fear death . If you haven't actually had a real ass minute with yourself , looked in the mirror and said 'We all are dying . You are dying' you probably haven't had your 'A Ha !' moment of enlightenment . What makes me uneasy about my death is the result of my death . It breaks my heart to think of what my death would do to my mother , brothers and sister . I can't even wrap my head around what I'd put by best friends through if I were to die . I'm weary about not making a big enough impact with the life I've been given . Addressing death and the realness that we are all gunna kick the bucket has given me a freedom and individual purpose I never knew I needed . 

Once you come to terms with the FACT that you are dying , you can finally live . 

I wake up each day grateful that I have another chance to put a smile on someone's face . I wake up with a quiet FUCK YEA mentality that I was given another chance to make an impact . I wake up happy that I get to talk to my mom again . Hell , I wake up with a smirk for the simple fact that I can roll over , check my IG and toss out some likes . Lol . 

Addressing death and understanding that I don't fear death itself , rather I'm uneasy about the result of my death - I now live a life solely to do good . To encourage and support the people around me . To take risks . TO BE HONEST . To take no shit . To fall in love and be ok with falling in love . To tell someone they're beautiful . To hold a door for someone . When you understand that you can die at any second , it really puts your existence into perspective and it lights a fire in you to leave the BEST memories about you when that day comes . The clock is ticking and you'll never see the second hand as it draws closer and closer to that final chime so step up and own your life . #SomeDailyJoe